Trace Cyrus
If you've been listening to the radio lately, you might have heard the song "Shake It" by Metro Station. It's a brilliant concoction of emo-pop-tasticness and will make you want to thrash your hair around and jump up and down.
I thought there was something slightly mysterious about Metro Station. They seem like every other emo band, except their hit single was a little too catchy and their outfits and hair do's were styled a little too perfectly. This couldn't be just some ordinary band from the middle of nowhere.
I looked them up on Wikipedia, and then suddenly, everything made sense.
Trace Cyrus, the lead singer and guitarist, is Miley Cyrus' brother. Mason Musso, vocalist and guitarist, is the brother of Mitchel Musso, who stars alongside Miley on the hit Disney show Hannah Montana.
Miley Cyrus and Mitchel Musso
Well, that explains everything. Metro Station has been touched by Disney's magic wand, giving them that look and sound that is just so...marketable.
Everyone, including me, is falling for it, and there are plenty more examples of Disney's sickeningly-sweet spawns, including Miley herself and the Jonas Brothers, that are primped and molded into that signature Disney style that attracts teenage fans like zombies to human flesh.
These teenage spawns are guaranteed to rake in the millions.
People are comparing the Jonas Brothers to the Beatles. John Lennon must be rolling in his grave.
The Jonas Brothers
And we can't forget that Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake and Christina Aguilera got their start on the Disney Channel's Mickey Mouse Club back in the day.
People often refer to our generation as the "MTV Generation" but in reality, we should be called the "Disney Generation."
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